Upon my lofty bed of concrete I lay,
Starring back at the darkness above my head,
Admonishing the slightly blowing breeze,
Spying the half drawn willow drapes.
I feel the pain to the roots of my dreads,
The tears slightly thugging at the corners of my eye,
The smile slowly fading from my mind,
And Yanni’s nightingale playing me to peace.
The reminders of what could have been,
Tales of how it would have felt,
Disappointment at the thought of it,
Freedom from a future unkown.
Those drizzles upon the flat sheet,
Are the answers to my bellowing soul,
The pair far gone from one another,
A silence that never brought calm.
Times past and age creeps,
The unwelcome visitor to a heart set on adventure,
So little time and not even there yet,
I sigh, twist and fret, but tarry I will.
When they are forth and the sky is lit,
The smiles returned and the wind bleats,
I will once more dance and soar,
After which all would have been said and done.
Into my abode I have entered where all seem quiet and tender and I’m laying down on the couch and pondering…… Why is the world such a twisted place. I close my eyes for a little while and rub my temples where it hurts the most almost drifting away into careless slumber, but the resounding noise around me reminds me that I have not fed today.
Sighs….it was such a long day, my thoughts kept drifting towards my environment and all those surrounding it, there is no friend in mother, there is no friend in family all I have is Jesus, that mighty man of battle that has stolen my heart time and time again, bidding me to move at his pace.
Why wouldn’t they understand, that these are not mere wimps of mine. I’ve acted strong enough and I don’t want to be anymore, I want to be cradled in the arms of warmth, where milk, honey and grace flows.
Sometimes I wonder if my heart will fail me soon for all the pounding hoofs I make it go through. The chest pains have become physical, those which were once emotional. I will get there someday and I know my blog will be there to tell the tale………good night.